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Forum Home  →  Discussion  →  Universal credit migration  →  Thread

Universal credit and cakes

Ruth Knox
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Vauxhall Law Centre

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Do you think they have rolled six recipes into one?

Andrew Dutton
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Welfare rights service - Derbyshire County Council

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The cake should have had 40% removed before being served up.

stevemac
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Horsham CAB, West Sussex

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will they have to wait 5 weeks before they can begin to eat it

Mike Hughes
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Senior welfare rights officer - Salford City Council Welfare Rights Service

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I presume we’ve checked out the Neil Couling Twitter account? Loads of cake pictures there. The temptation to childishly doctor the one with “UC” on it is one I’m still struggling to resist.

ROBBO
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Welfare rights team - Stockport Advice

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I’m afraid my UC cake appears to be only half baked.

Peter Turville
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Ruth Knox - 11 December 2018 04:25 PM

Do you think they have rolled six recipes into one?

surely six old cakes rolled into one and covered with some new icing to make it look like a new cake but someone has thrown away the label that said ‘not to be eaten, for display purposes only’?

Andrew Dutton
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From April 2013 - ‘Universal Credit is a sausage’

First catch your legacy benefits.

Skin and gut them; reserve the innards in a large bowl.

Take the new outer skin, called Universal Credit, and then stuff with contents of bowl. Internal coherence is not important here, just appearance. Sweep away any leftover bits.

Claim loudly it is the best sausage there ever was.

Refuse to serve it up, and deny the cooker isn’t working.


Ideal for fry-ups.

Paul_Treloar_AgeUK
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Information and advice resources - Age UK

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Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don’t think that I can take it
‘Cause it took so long to bake it
And I’ll never have that recipe again
Oh no!

Martin Williams
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Welfare rights advisor - CPAG, London

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As you have ordered a cake, we are afraid to say that we are immediately taking away all your other food. You may or may not be able to get the cake. But you can’t eat any legacy food stuffs. So it is cake or die.

Mike Hughes
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Senior welfare rights officer - Salford City Council Welfare Rights Service

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UC as a smoothie cannot be allowed to die.

Martin Williams
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Welfare rights advisor - CPAG, London

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Attached is the Poplar cake from 22/2/17….

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Andyp5 Citizens Advice Bridport & District
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Citizens Advice Bridport & District

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Paul_Treloar_AgeUK - 12 December 2018 01:17 PM

Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don’t think that I can take it
‘Cause it took so long to bake it
And I’ll never have that recipe again
Oh no!

MacArthur Park by Richard Harris! 

 

Andyp5 Citizens Advice Bridport & District
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Martin Williams - 13 December 2018 12:02 PM

Attached is the Poplar cake from 22/2/17….

Really moving cake!

Andrew Dutton
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Welfare rights service - Derbyshire County Council

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Marie Antoinette says: “DWP has something of a tin ear where history is concerned. Let them attend food banks.”

BC Welfare Rights
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Andrew Dutton - 12 December 2018 01:12 PM

From April 2013 - ‘Universal Credit is a sausage’
.

My colleague’s dad was a footballer who, when he retired had a sausage named after him by a local butcher. I doubt that anyone could stomach an Iain Duncan Sausage though

Andrew Dutton
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BC Welfare Rights - 13 December 2018 01:00 PM
Andrew Dutton - 12 December 2018 01:12 PM

From April 2013 - ‘Universal Credit is a sausage’
.

My colleague’s dad was a footballer who, when he retired had a sausage named after him by a local butcher. I doubt that anyone could stomach an Iain Duncan Sausage though

it would try to exit itself, causing a scene reminiscent of ‘Alien’.......then blame someone else for the mess.